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Do My Goals Make You Uncomfortable?

Lately I have been wondering about the shift in thinking, in terms of people trying to lead a healthy life.  In the past people seemed to be looked at with concern if they were rapidly gaining weight or not taking care of themselves properly.  As of late, I’ve noticed a completely different trend.  It seems that you are the odd man out if you prioritize your health and go out of your way to make sure you are getting exercise and eating healthy food.  Now, I do understand that there are extreme measures that can be looked at as obsessive, but in my opinion we have veered so far away from healthy lifestyles that anything above bringing a lean pocket to work is considered abnormal.

Clearly with the state of our health in this country, and at the rate which obesity is increasing, something has drastically switched over the years.  Is it our thinking, our habits, our education about food, our accessibility to unhealthy food, our culture, our attitude, our impatience, our issues of entitlement, or all of the above?

I come from a family that has always struggled with weight.  For a long time I thought I was over weight because of my “bad genetics.”  After years of reading and educating myself I realized I was unable to lose the weight because of my “bad habits.”  This was hard for me to grasp since I knew letting go of those habits meant letting go of the few things in my life that I felt were giving me happiness.  My entire life revolved around food and truly felt I deserved to be able to eat what I want, when I want. To me food meant fun, bonding, love, happiness, gratitude, acceptance, rewards and above all comfort.  Little did I know that it was my love affair with food that was also giving me feelings of self loathing, weakness, embarrassment, lack of energy, sadness and loneliness.  I remember starting these thoughts at the tender age of eight.

Talking with my clients, and from my own experience I realized people are given a hard time whenever they try to make a healthier lifestyle change.  For many this is because people do not want to be reminded of what they should be doing or they don’t want to lose the reliable lunch, drinking, gossip, care taker or whatever buddy they have come to rely on.  If all is status quo, they never have to change or feel bad about the choices they make.  That is, until one day when someone breaks up the pack and decides to pursue health and tries to better themselves!  The person who has decided to set these goals has the best intentions in mind, but for some reason some people around them feel as though they are personally being threatened by having their environment CHANGED!  Questions pop in their head like, is he/she judging me on what I am eating? A: NO.  Is he/she thinking I am lazy? A: NO!  Is he/she thinking she is better then me now because he/she has will power?  HECK NO!  HE/SHE just wants to try to feel better and be happier!

If you have set healthy goals for yourself, AMEN!  It’s the only way to get what you want out of life!  You are one of the few who has found the missing link to being happy, content and healthy.  We are not born this way!  It is a lifelong endeavor and search to continue to better yourself and remain disciplined in order to continue to gets life’s rewards that are waiting for those who work hard.  The only answer to this huge problem is to start with yourself and your own family.  Stop all the blaming and justifying,  and learn about what you should be doing and eating and take action.  Be and set the example you want for others.

Leaders will always be criticized in the beginning and that is what makes them stronger.   If you are thinking this sounds too tough and unrealistic then you have already chosen your future.  It all starts with your thoughts and attitude.  A healthy life is right around the corner and the smallest of steps make a difference.  Don’t rely on others for happiness and remember, the road is long but in the end it is better than you can even imagine.  Do it for you and your loved ones and start living your best life possible!

 

Set your goals high, never apologize for them and don’t stop until you get what you want!

Our 7 Principals Guarantee Your Partner’s Success

Do you want to do something HUGE in life? Leave a real legacy of some kind? Leave your “mark?” I do, and I canʼt imagine a life without such aspirations. I also canʼt imagine a life without Lori, my partner in crime. I firmly believe you need someone else whoʼs significant in your life to reach incredible success. Iʼm not talking “ooh I had a good day success.” Iʼm speaking of REAL BIG success. Doing something incredible. Achieving some large goals. That kind of success.

Now, Iʼm not saying it has to be a “significant other.” While it certainly helps if it is a spouse, girlfriend, boyfriend, partner, etc. because youʼre around each other so much, it could also be a close friend, mentor, or even a hired coach that gets you there.

So, after quite some thought, Iʼve put together a few of the reasons why Lori and I have been able to really bring out the best in each other, and what it takes to really be a good team.

1) Hold each other accountable. We all need someone to hold us accountable, even the best of us. Everyone has an off day occasionally, and thatʼs when you can count on your partner to give you that extra push, and make sure you stay on track. I canʼt tell you how many times I havenʼt wanted to go to the gym or run around the lake, but we still make each other go, and my love-handles thank her for it! We always feel so much better for it when weʼre done!

2) Set aside time to talk every day. Yes, every day. This can be in any form you like. Ours happens to be our walks that we start every morning out with. One hour of uninterrupted planning, motivating, listening, or dreaming. Many times weʼve woken up on the wrong side of the bed, but by the end of our walk, weʼve gotten each other straightened out for the day.

3) Be open to Outside Advice. If you only rely on yourself, or even just the two of you for new ideas, youʼre never going to grow outside of your own paradigm. Some of the biggest advancements in our careers have come from outside advice. Plenty of people have already been where youʼre trying to go…so seek them out!

4) Give HONEST feedback every time. This is the toughest of them all. No one wants to hurt each otherʼs feelings, but even the hardest things to say can be well-received if delivered in the right manner. Ever have to tell your wife that her self-tanner makes her look like an Oompa-Loompa? Yea, thatʼs a toughie!! Itʼs all in the delivery, (boy have I had to learn this!!) And if done correctly, youʼll help each other stay on track and reach your goals that much quicker. Youʼre not doing anyone any favors by letting them think theyʼre doing well when theyʼre not. Donʼt forget that positivereinforcement is also part of honest feedback, and will always mean that much more when your teammate knows itʼs sincere!

5) Be ready to make sacrifices. If youʼre going to be really successful, youʼre going to have to make many sacrifices. Be it time, money, friends, or whatever, youʼre not entitled to “get” everything you want AND achieve everything you want at the same time. Itʼs that simple. Once you accept this, the tough decisions get easier. In addition, if youʼre making a sacrifice for your partnerʼs goal, you better do so with a great attitude, or instead of helping, youʼre really just setting them back that much further!

6) Be into each others goals. I mean really get into them. You donʼt have to like them at first, but if youʼre not fully bought in to your partners goals, then youʼre probably not the right partner for them. Never tell them their idea is too big. In fact, challenge them to make it bigger! Youʼd be surprised how many ideas I didnʼt like at first, but once I gave them a fair shot and really listened to the merit behind them, I saw how exciting they could be once they became a reality. Furthermore, itʼs way more fun to be involved when you make their goals your own goals. The best part? Most of them have turned into the greatest moves weʼve ever made. We even have a new idea that I was reluctant to hear at first, but now may be the biggest and best move weʼve ever made yet!

7) Celebrate each otherʼs success in a BIG way!! Really do it up! After all that hard work, if youʼve achieved what you set out to do, then make sure you really enjoy it! Thatʼll be the only reason to do it all over again!

Some of the points above might seem obvious, and you might have even heard many of them before, but itʼs the consistency that you do them with that matters. These really are the principals that have guaranteed Lori and I success over and over again, and in some pretty big ways. They take work to implement on a regular basis, but if you really work to keep these points in the conscience part of your mind, I can just about guarantee that you and your partner will achieve anything you set out to!

Good luck, Chris

Hay Baby, What’s Your “Number”?

I promise I can make you wealthier in one easy move this year.  Pick your number!  Call your shot!  Just the way Babe Ruth did in the ’32 World Series, or with the bravado that Joe Namath had when he guaranteed a win before Super Bowl III.  That’s right, you’re going to choose how much you make in the upcoming year.  Become the “swami of salary!”

If you’re siting there saying I’m crazy, then read on, because this blog is really for you!  Too many of you set out each year saying, “I’m going to work hard doing the same old thing, and hope that it amounts to something decent this year.”  This is already a failing approach.  No different from running a fundraiser, or working out, you cannot start out without a firm goal in mind.  If you’re single, this is a good exercise for you and your budget, and if you’re a couple, this is even more powerful of an exercise, because you will hold each other accountable to delivering on your “number.”

 

I’ve done this my whole working life, and now Lori and I do this every year, and you know what?  It works!  It works because all of your energy and focus goes toward hitting this number.  You simply choose what you want to make in the upcoming year, and the start working it backwards to see how you’re going to get there.  Now, I know what many of you are thinking; “I have a salary, I don’t get to choose, my employer chooses for me.”  WRONG!  Your full time salary, if that’s the position that you’re in, is just one of the pieces of the puzzle.  Here’s how it works:

1.  Choose together.  If you’re a couple, both of you must be bought in and committed to this.  And for God’s sake, think big!  Don’t sell yourself short, it’s time to get ahead!

2.  Think Monthly.  Meaning, determine your monthly outgo, then add some savings and a nice cushion to it.  A real fluffy cushion if you want…but without being unrealistic.  Take this number multiplied by twelve months, and you’ve got “your number!”

3.  Now, take your number, and start subtracting your income sources below it.  First, your guaranteed income (salary, pensions, etc..), then, your likely income (bonuses, commissions, side jobs). If you were ambitious enough in choosing your number, this should leave you with a balance yet to make up.

4.  Next, to fill this remaining income gap, have fun and get creative.  List new ways you can createadditional income.  Perhaps this is a second job, maybe join a network marketing company, or turning a hobby or a talent into new income.  There is always something you can do extra if you really want to.  The key is to make it something you enjoy or are interested in.  Think outside the box, and have confidence in yourself. You can accomplish more than you think!

5.  Write this plan out, put it up somewhere visible, and start working it immediately.  A plan without action is not a plan at all.  Refer back to this plan, and tweak it when necessary, but never lose site of it, never giving in. You will hit your number if you’re committed to it year round.

 

Let me spell out an example for you.  Pretend your “number” is $120,000 a year.  Monthly, that’s just $10,000 per month.  You know that you have a salary of $60,000 annually, and that you’re likely to get a 10% bonus of another $6000 that year, totaling $66,000.  Your spouse has a $36,000 salary and receives no bonus.  You now total $102,000 per year in guaranteed and likely income, leaving you with an $18,000 gap.  Sound like a lot of money?  It’s not, if you break it down monthly to just $1500 per month.

 

Now the fun part.  You love Yoga, dance or bootcamps, and could get certified quickly.  You teach 3 classes a week, splitting the class revenue 50/50 with the studio.  Assuming your average class is just ten people at $15 per head, that’s 50% of $150 per class that you keep.  Take that $75 per class times three classes per week, times four weeks per month, and you just added $900 per month to your income, leaving your gap at just $600 per month.  Where could your partner find that $600 per month?  A second job of just fifteen hours per week?  Network marketing? Serving or bar tending? It’s out there if you look!

 

The more you do this, the better you’ll get at it, and it works no matter what your number is!  You’ll start to become excited, and even addicted to your number!  It can be one of the most fun, and even healthiest exercises you’ll do as a couple. Imagine the stress you’d eliminate if each of you knew you were carrying your weight on your way to a financial surplus?  Incredible feeling! Single?  Then choose a friend to do this with for accountability.

 

The bottom line is this. If you read this and say it sounds like too much work, then that’s your problem.  Enjoy another year of financial hardship and mediocrity. If you say you’re not interested in money, fine, but I know you’re interested in more freedom and less stress.  You must call your shot!  You must do some planning, and you must put some work in, and if you do, you then have earned the right to expect all the benefits that come along with it!

 

As I write this on my porch, a gentleman in his black Lamborghini just drove by.  I assure you he chooses his number, and you can too!  I hope this exercise brings even a couple of you more happiness and freedom this upcoming year!

 

Happy planning,

Chris